2005-07-06 - 6:43 a.m.

I'm battling another deep dark mood at the moment. I don't know why but I seem to attack my on-line presence when I feel like this. I've already killed my fotothing site again, am toying with the idea of unsubbing from my main internet forum-y kinda thing group and killing diaryland. I am fighting these urges tho in the hope that the mood will pass and I will return to plain old grumpydom.

I think that a big part of the problem is a bloke who's happy and he shouldn't be. He doesn't have me you see :(

....not that I could make him happy or that I think he would make me happy in reality. Complicated huh? Like I've said before, I think too much.

I'll leave it at that and when the mood changes I'll kick myself for giving a shit about some damn bloke who doesn't want me. Normally I DON'T give a shit. Oh well.

The dog went to the vet and at 7 he's got the hips of a 15 year old dog and has cysts and arthritis. Don't know what's gonna happen yet apart from trying to get a stone in weight off him :(

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