2004-11-21 - 6:41 p.m.

So I get up this morning with inexplicable wounds on my left arm, a hole cut in my night clothes and a strange desire to go running.

"Aliens", reckoned Phoe matter of factually.

"What, Aliens bothered to travel millions of light years in order to take a fabric sample from my pajamas, scratch my arm and then turn me mad?"

"Yup"

Phoe believes everything is down to Aliens; creation, weather, you name it, it's probably due to some kind of Alien intervention.

I must admit though, my stomach feels very hot and bloated lately. That's all I bloody need, some alien spawn bursting out of me in the middle of an interview. I bet it waits until I've got the fit body I always wanted too. Sod's Law, that's what it'll be, Sod's bloody Law and I don't want kids anyway, let alone a bloody green one with lasers shooting out of it's eyes! Phoe would disapprove of my sweeping greenist generalisation here but I don't care, I'm in full drama queen mode and no one's gonna stop me.

Anyhoo, the Hungarian assault on my flasher story page continues unabated. I'm averaging 68 visits a day at the moment made up of approximately 60-odd Hungarians, a couple of Austrians and a couple of pro-flashers. It's so weird, I have become obsessed in my quest to find out where the bloody link to my page is on the Hungarian site the stats all relate back to. I have followed paths, links, googled and yahoo-ed and even simply explored but I can't find it! I'm toying with the idea of putting a guest book on the page to see if I can gleen any further information that way.

I called Fit Nigel up and he is coming for me tomorrow night for a bit of a run and a go at the bleep test to see how much fitness I've lost in the month I gave up on life, fitness and hope for the future (Gawd, that sounds dramatic dunnit?) Heck, I've got hope for the future really. Phoe and I have discussed what we will do if things go massively tits up for us and it is a plan very much along the lines of 'Sketty's worm Emporium'; a hare-brained scheme doomed to failure.

Ok, here it is: If things get really, really bad we've got the house which has increased in value by around �90,000 since Phoe bought it. She hasn't got a massive mortgage so if necessary we will flog the house, pay off all the bills and (cough) erm, buy a boat and become travellers. Now this might not sound too bad an idea unless you take into account the fact that neither of us has ever lived on a boat, sailed a boat, been on an adult boating holiday (I spent a miserable week on the Norfolk Broads with the school once) or have any technical/mechanical boating knowledge.

Still, it's a plan.....

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