2006-11-30 - 8:06 p.m.

...and as the paranoia fairy leaves the building, Sket unlocks her diary.

And the cause of the sudden foil-hatted, paint yerself white, baracade the doors paranoia?

Someone searched for my diary under 'Sket's Diary' and I suspected it was 'P' (you know, the person I share with. The person I've done nothing but vent about/tell everyone about the fight we had recently) THEN I realised that I'd become paranoid and had searched under several phrases such as 'Sket's Diary' myself a couple of days ago just to see how easy it WOULD be to find me if nosy friends went asearching.

...only I'd forgotten I'd done this and when I remembered, the paranoia fairy told me that I was wrong and that I hadn't searched that phrase at all and that it was 'P' and we were on the verge of yet another bust up.

Y'know what paranoia did to me then? Well, despite me being 95% certain it was my own search, I logged on as her and went through her history to see if she'd been to the diary!

For godsake Sket! If you don't want people reading what you've said then DON'T SAY IT. DON'T SHARE THINGS IN THE HEAT OF THE MOMENT AND THEN THE PARANOIA FAIRY CAN'T GET YOU. But you know me, I over share to the point of ridiculousness and then I go all bug-eyed and strange for a few days.

It's frightening that I work within the criminal justice system really isn't it?

...and how's that going I hear you ask?

Well, apart from coveting a Barrister's wig, my new job has seen me visiting a bail hostel (where some bloke shouted every swear word known to man (and some unknown) and called some invisible foe every kind of bastard under the sun), visiting Crown Court where I met a Somalian double rapist (male and female victims) and sitting in on a child protection conference.

I've met a 19 year old who took 56 paracetamol, ending up on life support just because he didn't want to live with his grandmother any more (no abuse, it just wasn't cool), a bloke who broke his girlfriends coccyx and threatened to cut her up into a thousand pieces, a bloke who lost his temper with a baby and broke it's leg then set himself on fire due to the shame of it all and a bloke who sent threatening text messages to a monk (?)

I've discovered that there is a pool on the best excuses as to why people have failed their drugs tests. Personal faves have been "I tested positive because I had a can of diet coke just before my test", "I must have tested positive because I kissed someone on methadone" and the beautifully crappy "The drugs must have gotten into my system from sitting on a public toilet seat which had been used to snort coke"

As you know, one of my fellow trainees has become bizarrely fixated with me and is almost stalkerish in her desire to sit next to me (I have to see her tomorrow which isn't filling me with joy) and another, that I've barely spoken 5 words to, sent me a rambling text message asking how best she should wreak revenge on her ex-boyfriend! Why the fuck is she asking me? Am I a freak magnet or something or is there something about myself that others see that I simply don't get?

�

previous - next