2004-10-14 - 10:13 p.m.

I think something bad nearly happened to me when I took the dogs for a late walk in the park yesterday.

Phoe was away (she's been away a lot lately which means that I have been able to watch my favourite kinda crap, such as Sabrina the teenage witch, on tv rather than her 'minutes from disaster' kind of stuff which has been great) and all day I couldn't be arsed to take the boys out. Then it started to get a bit dark and I knew that I'd have to go before I completely lost the light.

I walked down shit alley and into the park where I threw the ball for my stupid, toothless dog in the dying light. Some guy who'd been walking behind me passed by and continued on the path ahead. We exchanged the usual dog walker 'hellos' and after a bit I continued along the path myself. Just around one of the bends the path has a bit more cover from a bunch of big bushes and over hanging trees and as I approached them I noticed just how dark it had become. It was at this point that I heard a rustle from the bushes and realised that the guy that had passed was now standing, in the dark, in the bushes. Now, I've been in this position once before when I walked down a path and into a railway tunnel only to be met with the jogger who had overtaken me earlier pulling his 'man' violently towards me, I now had the same feeling of doom sweep over me.

I just kept my head up and continued walking briskly without breaking my stride. I didn't have my running shoes on but I knew that the smart dog would defend me, he's done it before when we've been out and he's not liked some bloke who's approached. All kinds of things passed through my head, heck, I know that I am quite strong; I had that confirmed on Tuesday, and the guy didn't have the advantage of surprise as I was expecting something to happen. Then another dog came running up meaning that another dog walker was approaching. I felt some relief until I realised it was the guy Phoe and I had labelled as a weirdo several months ago when he followed us around the park. Great, from one weirdo to another. I again, just stuck my head in the air and continued to walk with purpose, passing weirdo 2 with a steely look into his eyes and a curt nod. I was lucky this night, nothing happened and I got home safely. Perhaps the guy had gone into the bushes for a legitimate reason that I can't think of, who knows......

In other news, the stuff from the Home Office arrived today so that I can apply for dual nationality. I had to smile, they're a sneaky bunch there in immigration. Amongst the questions about good character they slipped in this gem:

'Have you ever committed an act of terrorism or genocide?'

Woah! I need to think about that one for a bit. Has anyone ever said yes to that question? I mean, it's not something you could really conceal is it, a mass killing of an entire race of people?

I'd probably be surprised actually, they seem to let any bugger into the country nowadays.

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