2006-07-01 - 1:30 p.m.

Ok, I'll skip quickly over the drunken bum that I was last night and all the pissed up emailing/comments posting which resulted. At least one of you was witness to that display (snigger) and for that I apologise (she laughed in an unapologetic way)

Memories of last night, which was a house party thrown by one of my cow-orkers. I hadn't wanted to go as I don't particularly like most of them and I consider socialising with them to be like MORE work. I'm a right miserable sod aren't I?

It turned out to be a most pleasant evening despite me completely forgetting the name of my new boss and introducing him to Phoe stiltedly as 'Erm, The Man'. How embarrassing is that? How CRAP is that? He was embarrassed and so were the people sitting either side of him (including the woman who also applied for my new job). They were probably both wondering who the fuck is about to start working in that department and how the feck I got the job!

Sorry for the fruity language btw, I've been trying to be a nicer girl lately. I don't think it's working very well

Other memory. The only person that I really really like at work lost her mother to brain cancer last week (Jeez!). She was at the party and was fine as she was saying that she was glad that she had the time to say everything she wanted to say to her mother and that it was a very quick passing in the end. From the sudden discovery of the cancer, it took just 3 months and she didn't really suffer and was quite lucid and still her mother to the end.

...but that's not what I wanted to really tell you. This is the thing; 'M' (who'd lost her Mother) was telling us that she was really pleased that her Mom would now be with her Father and that they really REALLY loved each other. Every drawer that they've opened contains at least one love letter that one of them had sent to the other.

How lovely is that?

Apparently, her Father used to bring her flowers every Friday and that they used to write these love letters to each other. Her Mother never got over her husband's death which had been 13 years previously and just wanted to be with him again. I was really touched by this story. How wonderful is that? It also made me feel a bit sorry for myself as no one (apart from one obsessive boyfriend who ended up trying to kill me) has ever felt remotely like this about me. Let's face it, it ain't likely to happen either. I've been single the whole time I've shared with Phoe. I guess I sacrificed finding true love and happiness to help another person who'd been thru loads of seriously bad shit and who needed some support in order to survive. I wonder if I'd have made the same decision if I'd known what would become of me?

(sigh), probably....

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