2006-01-28 - 12:02 a.m.

Oh My God! I've GOT TO HAVE THIS:

One on-line friend has already questioned my need and simply can't understand why I want a life sized cut-out of a 17th century Parliamentarian who ended up having his head cut off! I say, hey, EVERY girl needs a representation of their very own civil war mongering Lord Protector of England, Scotland and Wales (and France, I believe)! Phoe reckons that Charles I woouldn't be very pleased (but he's dead any way and they weren't offering any Charles I cut-outs who could look at me in a disaproving way.

I just think that it would be really fucking funny to have it sitting in the back of the VW Beetle. I want to take it everywhere and photograph it in the pub and in other situations such as being forced into transvestisism by having my clothes put onto it!

It will also be useful as I can stand him in the window to make burglars think we've always got someone in the house OR I can stand it in the window and pretend that we've got a time traveling machine! If we act weird and shifty all the time and flash bright lights around the place at strange hours people are sure to believe us! It's so Bill and Ted Dude - (imagine guitar music)

I haven't been so excited about a piece of crap since I saw the lifesized fibreglass cows and sheep in Birmingham. If I hadn't visited on the train I'd have had to get one of each and strap the cow to the roof of the car!

In other news: I haven't eaten solids now for 17 days and the hunger is wonderful. I went to the gym today and pushed myself really hard. Unfortunately I went really dizzy after half an hour so I think I'll have to drop my level down a bit....

BTW - this has nothing to do with me wanting a life-sized cutout of Oliver Cromwell!

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