2006-04-16 - 5:21 p.m.

Remember my old mate Nigel? The fella who trained me until I was fit enough to get thru that damnable bleep test for THE INTENDED JOB? Well, you may remember that he moved away and since that time I have allowed my fitness levels to drop and I also discovered that I had taken too long to sort out my health and now I've been told to reapply for the job from scratch. Well any way, Nige came visiting today and gave me a load of motivational bollocks about pulling myself together and to stop being so negative about myself yada yada yada. I made all the right sounds and when he finally left I was almost punching the air with joy due to all the pent up positivity I was now feeling.

Of course, that was until the second I shut the front door. I waved him off and then allowed the smile to drop from my face like a brick before slumping immediately back into normal Sket-mode and making for the chocolate doughnut before collapsing into the chair and glowering like the most evil bastard who ever lived...

HEY, IT'S EXHAUSTING FAKING POSITIVITY!

He did all kinds of exercises to make me feel good about myself and to hold onto those feelings. He also made me question my motivation, tell him exactly what I wanted and why. Y'know, the kind of questions you don't really ask yourself seriously. All good stuff really but fucking hell......

Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck. Damn me for ALLOWING MYSELF to be pissed off. I really should start thinking about how the me felt in the visualisation of how I would feel if I'd got everything I wanted.

I know it sounds awful, but don't you ever want to put your fist in the face of all these positive people floating around? In my eyes, you have to have grumpy people in this world. Heck, if EVERYONE was positive and got what they wanted out of life the world would be too perfect and civilisation would crumble! You have to have negativity in order to notice the positivity so really, my grumptitude is a good thing and Phoe and everyone else in the world can go screw themselves if they disagree with me! By blaming Phoe for everything that goes wrong and walking around the place like I'm possessed of devils I am, in fact, saving humanity as we know it!

(Oh and if Pyro Jack doesn't agree and tells me off, I won't tell him where the naked Sketty pictures are on-line :)

So there, I've saved the world. No need to thank me..........

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